Tasting Notes from my Christmas Stocking

In 1999, when I moved to Australia my sister, Heat, started a humurous newsletter to keep everyone informed as to her life and news. In order to keep this funny and witty, she borrowed little clever snippets from here and there and, occasionally, poked fun at her friends and family. Woe betide the sad soul who unwittingly said something funny or silly with in earshot of my sister. As often ad not it would (and does) end up in print. Thanks to my frequent emails home, woe has betided me in this particular way plenty over the last 7 years.

Since I moved back to Canada, I am not emailing as frequently and Heat clearly is lacking in suitable material  as a result. So her new filler for the newsletter, pokes fun at Lex Culinaria. Her most recent newsletter featured a purportedly  "Lex Culinaria" inspired article about the time she mistakenly bought strawberry flavoured milk for her camping trip and the disatrous stroganoff noodles that resulted. It was pretty funny. Especially since she actually ate it. Ugh.

In furtherance of this fun-poking, she and her partner, Corey, bought me Cheese in a Can and a Spam Singles packet for Christmas. I am quite impressed that you can buy vaccuum packed single slices of Spam. I had no idea! I also had no idea that it was so easy to "rip and tear my way to Crazy Tasty Town". What marketing genius came up with that creepy phrase? Perhaps that kind of slogan goes over well in Korea.

For the record, I did eat the becheesed cracker pictured at the top of the post - it tastes (unsurprisingly) like the cheese in those little Kraft cheese and cracker packets. You know...the ones with the little red plastic stick for spreading the cheese. I loved those as a kid. I also (unapologetically, if inexplicably) still have a soft spot for Cheez Whiz. I know it starts life as mouldy cheese ends and then gets coloured neon orange to cover up its natural grey colour. I know all this and yet I still eat it every once in a while. I do not have a soft spot for Spam.

Corey and Heat did redeem themselves by giving me two great cookbooks. Cakes added to the culinary treasure trove with a KitchenAid immersion blender with umpteen kajillion gadgets, a cool silicon pastry brush (which Matilda has already chewed 3 bristles off!) and a snazzy new sieve to replace my old, lumpy, rusty one that I bought in 1996 in Vancouver when I first discovered the joy of shopping at restaurant supply stores.

I hope everybody's Christmas was equally as fun and full of great family and gourmet goodies. I promise to tell you about the roast lamb I made for Christmas dinner!

Comments

[Tania]

I can totally understand your fondness for Cheez Whiz; there are times when all I want is a grilled cheese sammie made with those plastic-wrapped Kraft singles, with a big blob of ketchup on the side. Love the Spam slogan; sounds like it belongs on www.engrish.com ...

Happy holidays!

[Stephanie]

Cheez Whiz!

Wow...haven't had that in years, but it makes me think of my late Grampa. So does the Spam, for that matter. He hated eating spaghetti, because he said it had so much during the War, he couldn't stand it anymore. Yet, he'd gladly open a can of SPAM and fry it up. To which I say 'huh?'.

I, too, like those little cheese and cracker packs...it's probably the red wand!

Looks like some good cookbooks...maybe you'll find some nice appetizers to bring to the next Blog Party! (shameless plug)

Wishing you a happy new year!

[Heath]

Here's my gourmet contribution: Cheese Whiz is great sprayed onto salty pretzels. (Don't tell the eGullet people I said so, please.)

And yay for kitchen gifts! My husband was embarrassed to give me presents for the kitchen because he thought it seemed selfish, like a 60s sitcom husband. But the kitchen presents were the best ones of all!